Make your relationship time, focused! With a glimpse at our new book “Husband, Wifey happy”

The computer in the toilet / bathroom syndrome!

 

Nowadays it’s become clear the dangers of addictions and addictive personalities. The internet in all circles of society has had an effect on communication individually and communally. The positive goal is to unify the voice of the individual on a global scale. However, as every good Rabbi has pointed out, “it’s much easier to have good relationship with someone far away than a close neighbor.” Even more so a close relative and even more so our Husband and Wifey!

The challenge is huge, even for our Husband like this, as we all know that every minute the phone rings, the text buzzes and emails with pokes and jokes hit you from every direction.  Let’s say our Husband and Wifey are on a higher plain than someone who feels the need to be on line and connected 24/7. And we don’t even mean 24/6 for those keeping Shabbat/ the 7th day of rest/ Shabbos. Rather, our Husband and Wifey don’t even have internet or a computer in the house.  Our Husband works in an office with on line access in order to help great causes of education and helping poor children. Gathering funds to pay for these fortunate ones come out of their unfortunate circumstances. While our Husband is doing P.R. and S.E.O. in order to strengthen this institute’s name. Even though most people feel the need to be on line 24/7 or 6 to achieve this kind of work. Our ideal Husband thinks he can accomplish all the above goals, with a phone that is big enough to snowboard on and old enough just to make a phone call as long it’s in an area where maybe there might be some service.

The plan of our Husband is to focus on his relationship with Wifey and holy growing family. However, we make plans and G-d laughs or rather gives us further room to grow. A well-meaning friend and mentor had an old computer that he no longer needed. A laptop computer was the size of a desktop almost. Our Husband of our story had a fund raising event and needed a bit more on-line time than his office hours provided. The Husband next door neighbor had an internet connection and gave him the code for a previous story of job change. The new/old laptop/desktop computer needed a wireless key and after 80 shekels in a cool store in the new bus station our Husband was on line in his own home. Only costing 80 shekels and some needed storage place to keep this new monster away from the kids, our Husband was on line and connected in the home. The updated plan of our Husband was to use this new set up only in toilet time and late night networking with American friends on-line that time.

However, the toilet syndrome began; as this old fart computer took ages to turn on and being the fan was broken this time machine would overheat and turn off. Our Husband realized he needed top M.L.M. strategy to make the most of this, firstly to turn it on in advance and secondly quickly put in the code and quickly do what was needed to be done. The bottom line was task left undone or not done properly. The new time waster was waiting for it to cool down to start up again until one day this Hi-Tec oven fell crashed and the fan turned on! Now our Husband was in big trouble as things went on the computer took over hours of time, toilet time and beyond. Wifey complained and threatened a few times to throw this junk out the window. The Husband showed her she could get her children to sit and watch pictures to use up their child like energies in an easy distracted way. However, Wifey wasn’t to be won over as easy as she saw their personal connecting time dwindle into more networking and the longest toilet/bathroom sessions humanly possible. Wifey preferred for the kid’s creative flow arts and crafts, rather than this old/new monster impinging on their lives. Anyhow, an old computer and wireless key dropped on the floor one to many times ended the tyranny of this new found idol. The worldwide awakening of the addictiveness etc… of on line inter-net ended the neighbor’s free connection and a move of house a few months later finished completely this midnight intruder. And now Husband’s old computer sits in a bag collecting dust somewhere and Wifey gets potentially her needed and important connection time.  The kids happily return to their arts and crafts and the world seems to brighten. Until a new brand new laptop finds itself in our Husband’s hands. No inter-net in the house, but instead an opportunity to write this spiritually guiding story for a happy Husband and Wifey on many a bus journey (car sickness permitted).

Wifey face to face, the latest glimpse to make us all more focused!

By the way you’re welcome to contribute you’re “Husband, Wifey happy” tales by sending us right now you’re story to our email umuse613@gmail.com and comments on the “midnightrabbi spiritualguide” Blog.

 

From distractions to actually look at Wifey face to face!

So anyone might ask themselves if they still even think for a second, why am I so distracted. And what is marriage all about other that full emotional connection, with the face to face truth of the secret of the world. We’re not talking about some commercial rip off version of “the secret”, but rather something so deep and obvious that in a world gone mad is the most hidden secret of them all. The secret is real focus and attention that joins two beings in such a way that only G-d, Himself, could be part of and not distract from this intense binding of two souls into their essential oneness.

The soul filled Husband sat at his table. Professing his profound awakening this Rosh Hashanah (the holy days of the Jewish new-year), he realized as he read “the Garden of Peace” (Rabbi Shalom Arush translation by Lazer Brody on finding peace in your home) during the rather long prayer service of his very high and dedicated Shul (prayer house and congregation). The most important thing to remember is putting his Wifey first. The prioritized Husband knows that no Rabbi, no Job, no Family, no Friend and no other person, place or time must be allowed to feel as more loved than good happy Wifey.

The story telling Husband, pronounces his tale of righteous people who told there sincere followers to always put there Wifey first. Even for the holy days and prayer, to stay at home with the Wifey and pray near their house rather than some far off place with his spiritual leader. As the pious story runs to its end the sound of singing from our husbands spiritual leader emanates through the window. Their Yom tov meal that already stretched into the night due to the late finish of the prayer service already ran the Wifey ragged left with her little ones. And now at the climax of our devoted Husbands story, suddenly the sound of his Rabbi and friends, pulls him away from his table and running outside towards the dancing and singing of Tashlich (the custom at the end of the two days of Rosh Hashanah, is to throw all the previous sins into a place of water and fish, while reciting certain cleansing prayers of Repentance). Wifey is left bewildered and Husband is thinking how good he is with his stories of priorities and finding a Shul and Rabbi right next to where they live. After dancing with the fish and rounding of this joyous Day of Judgment, this fulfilled husband exercises judgment and find himself home late that night. Wifey is crying in her bed and he enters the war scene of dirty dishes and house with the kids thank G-d finally sleeping, no thanks to our Husband. He notices that chocolate milk has been spritzed all over the wall and begins his kind service of cleaning the mess! As the Husband scrubs the wall he sings a song of happiness at how good his focus is, you see the first thing he does is clean up the mess his Wifey is unable to clean.

Wifey gets angrier the more he sings and ignores her broken state and she angrily approaches him. On the way through the kitchen she screams and throws a tub of Salmon juices with bits of fish, he runs to calm her and prevent Wifey from more damage and they both slip and go flying on the Salmon juice. Now there both in a real mess, but wait that’s not even the end of it. Husband’s children have been putting play mobile men in tubs of water imitating the swimming pool they went to in the summer. Husband in his family care mode threw the water down the toilet so there shouldn’t be ANY damage. Unfortunately he mistakenly threw the play mobile men that were still swimming down the drain and blocked the toilet. This is a long story that required much cleaning as some mashugah plumber that has 10 advertisements with 10 phones came and splashed feces and urine all over the house and still didn’t unblock the toilets and expected his pay. 800 shekel to real plumber later and a few tons of washing, finally they were ready, our Husband and Wifey for the forgiveness that only Yom Kippur the Day of Atonement can bring.

A famous friend of mine said to me that the only day of the year he disconnects is Yom Kippur the Day of Atonement, 25 hours off line. And Rav Moshe Weinberger shlita proudly proclaims at a class he gave which interestingly is on a video on YouTube that he’s never been on line or even on a computer, wow. The ability to focus and give our Husband to Wifey emotionally face to face is from the holiest source and will solve all these problems that were depicted above. The amazing ability for man specifically Husbands to be distracted by everything and anything, even more so for those on line. To focus and face your self is such an intense experience especially when Wifey is the one needing our Husbands attention. This feeds and nourishes our Wifey’s emotional need, but our Husband has an unbelievable ability to side line this crucial lifesaving and happy home making goal.

So let’s begin another story where this time our Husband gets it right and doesn’t turn his life into a disaster scene from a movie. Also face the inner holiness within, now read below :-

The Kodesh Hakodashim, “Holy of Holies”, the most sacred site in traditional Judaism, is the inner sanctuary within the Tabernacle and Temple in Jerusalem when Solomon’s Temple and the Second Temple were standing. Traditional Judaism regards the location where the inner sanctuary was originally located, on the Temple Mount in Mount Moriah, as retaining some or all of its original sanctity for use in a future Third Temple. The exact location of the Kadosh Hakadashim is a subject of dispute.

The Kadosh Hakadashim was located in the westernmost end of the Temple building, being a perfect cube: 10 cubits by 10 cubits, by 10 cubits. The inside was in total darkness and contained the Ark of the Covenant, gilded inside and out, in which were placed the Tablets of the Covenant, the Rod of Aaron and a pot of manna. The Ark was covered with a gilded lid known as the “mercy seat” for the Divine Presence. When the Temple was rebuilt after the Babylonian captivity, the Ark was no longer present in the Holy of Holies; instead, a portion of the floor was raised slightly to indicate the place where it had stood. Josephus records that Pompey profaned the Temple by insisting on entering the Holy of Holies.

The Holy of Holies was hidden by a veil, and no one was permitted to enter except the High Priest,and even he could only enter once a year on Yom Kippur, to offer the blood of sacrifice and incense before the mercy seat.

Everyone can be the High Priest and the Holy of Holies is your home and focus with Wifey in your marriage! Our Husband has to believe in himself to make Wifey happy!

 

The Guiding point! Make it a reality, a real need!

So you all might be thinking as your reading this book, what the Husband are you getting @? This isn’t me; I never did such a ridiculous set of deeds like this spiritually adept person. However, the point of this book is not just to entertain, to waste your time and money. Rather, to educate us all, including myself, to awaken the soul to this crucial mission, and make a difference in our Husband truly making happy our Wifey. The spiritual path to do this is bottom line as all of Jewish history as a good example, is to learn from the mistakes and get it right!

Below is an image of Husband (the sun) and Wifey (the moon) shinning together beautiful and united, as will be in the days of new. With thanks to Shalom Bayit (Peace in the home) on facebook!We all agree we are standing at the end of history as we know it. Everything has changed even in my short life time, the instant generation of Now! We want instant good health, happiness and many want spiritual fulfilled homes. Ask yourself how many broken homes you know! Ask yourself how many broken hearts and souls? How many victims of a lack of education in relationship skills and spiritual guidance to get it right, right now! A friend once commented that our Husband in this story is always the fall guy and that’s exactly the best educator. The darkness of our Husband and Wifey’s stories will be turned into light with G-d’s help and our dedication.  This is a special moment of inspiration and awakening that turns the confusion into the light of clarity, right now! Life changing in all ways! Easy to accomplish with our Husband of humor and the overall Supreme force guiding us all to get it right.Time is of the essence and we need to get to the point so let’s hear more inspirational, mind altering stories and from here our Husband will make happy Wifey eternal more! By the way you’re welcome to contribute you’re “Husband, Wifey happy” tales by sending us right now you’re story to our email umuse613@gmail.com and comments on the “midnightrabbispiritualguide” Blog.

A Glimpse beyond with a new book beyond, “happiness”!

Thy husband 2B when arth thou on time for the date?

A summer date and full moon shines in the center of Jerusalem. Spiritually this is all meant to be, decreed from the beginning of Creation, two souls that were really always one. The intense yearning to find the other half is coming to a happy goal, however, in the middle of the dating, off he flies back to London for a family Simcha/ occasion.

The London streets light up as this happy soul returns to his birth place. Our Husband to be and only to be is rejoicing with his family and friends of old. The only comfort is to his Wifey to be, is his half-drunk phone calls of excitement to return, and don’t worry I will be back in time for our next date and Teizax tests (test for hereditary compatibility before we can confirm the engagement).

The Husband to be, thought quickly to himself what’s the point of these tests anyhow? He continued meeting his friends before his flight back.

One more visit from his cousin and commemorating some great pictures from his visit to him in Jerusalem together. His father warns him that he’s going to miss the flight if he doesn’t leave soon. His father wakes him up from his fun when he says that he’s not taking him back to the airport directly, just to the over land train station. Oih gevalt, they leave quickly hugging his cousin good bye and off they drive to the train station. His father has changed his tune somewhat now feeling guilty “it should work out son, just run to the train and safe flight back to Israel”. He runs and he runs from train to train, his over packed suitcase weighs him down with new presents, mums bought new clothes and books he never had time to learn. He meets a fellow runner on their mission to make it in time to the check in counter at the airport. Now they arrive at the terminal and the fellow runner gives his story of the cab breaking down on the high way and paying a small fortune for a second cab, while they travel the special train from Terminal A to B. They run into Departures, it’s a late night flight and all is empty. The fellow runner senses what’s happened and begins to lose his cool. He sees a flight attendant “I’m sorry the flight is closed” Ahbhh…

Being a typical Husband to be, he had no more money even to go home and who wants to go home. Maybe they won’t let him go back at all to Israel. He looks down and sees a pound coin and uses this heavenly sent pound coin to phone his mother-in-law to be. She kindly agrees and invites him to stay by her for one night while she will try and squeeze him on his next flight. The mother-in-law had already given her blessings for the engagement, but now she would have to bail him out of this one so he can even get there and make the engagement reality. The little money he has is just enough thank G-d to get him to his mother-in-laws house and off he goes midnight time again. The rabbi who lives next door his mother-in-law agrees to let him stay. The next day before she flies herself to Israel she will try and squeeze him on the same flight. Thank G-d, after a restful sleep at the Rabbi’s house and sorting out the flights to Israel our Husband to be was able to come on the same flight as the mother-in-law to be. Now they both had the added incentive of getting to know each other and make his way back to his Wifey to be.

He landed just in time for the positive Texzacs test and results, and a special Lchaim after the engagement was sealed by the trees outside the Kotel and old city walls of Jerusalem. And that’s where we link back to the Lchaim story above and those special plastic fruits. Our Husband and Wifey were together, well almost.

 

Another Glimpse “Husband, Wifey happy” the book you can Guide and make reality!

The dressing gown and the beads hanging from the door saved their lives!

photo - CopyLet’s go back to the newlyweds 1st nights together. Now we not talking about the beginning mamesh ( yeshivish language meaning really or Betezm = in essence) rather after a few months of marital bliss, the intifada leaving a ruffled pillow feathers, and their bottom line opinion and goal, to stick it out in the holy land no matter what. War planes flying above and rioting calming down between the differing groups. Friends we know well leaving out of fear either of the pending war that never came or the potential bus suicide bombing that unfortunately made destruction apart of life in Jerusalem. However, being newlyweds and determined ones at that, our Husband talks of belief in our loving protective Father above and below, especially when the below Father is helping to pay the rent. Wifey shakes of the fears of friends who have already left the holy land for supposedly safer shores. She begins to venture forth to work at night painting up other happy Wifey’s to be and giving them the best look for there soon to be Husbands at their spiritual union (i.e. the wedding, which by the way needs as much distraction from what they both have got themselves into – the mitzvah/commandment of making the bride and groom happy!). Our Husband awaits her return every night nervously not sure he likes this routine bus trip to more classes on makeup and design. He imagined their beginning of marriage, spending long nights together serenading Wifey with his guitar and talking about deep thoughts until the crack of dawn.

Instead, our Husband was worrying about his Wifey returning safely on the bus back home late into the night, while he almost fell asleep waiting reading some uninteresting novel about spiritual guides etc… So one of those long nights alone our Husband got it into his head tonight would be different, instead of anxiously waiting he would go out to greet her at the nearest bus stop at least a 10 minute walk. Since it was close to midnight and he the rabbi was already in Paros’s pajamas and dressing gown. The Purim soul of this husband (being he was born on Purim 16th Adar when its 3 days in Jerusalem, and a holy rabbi already called him “a Purim yid”) came out that moment and this time armed with his long winter coat over his Paros’s pajamas outfit, braved the cold windy night. All for the sake of love and life did our Husband make his way towards the love of his life Wifey. Wifey quickly exits the bus at the right stop and her jaw drops. Oh no, not again! The most embarrassing Husband in the world trick again. Like when they were dating and he turned up in his dad’s oversized suit while making all sorts of mistakes in Hebrew to the Rabbi’s who praised his wifey in front of him while praising him that he’s recently moved into a top class of the school. “She’s such a Mevakesh (= ‘wants to know the truth no matter what’), and the soon to be Husband dressed in a fat man costume gone thin, replies to the Rabbi in front of the soon to be Wifey, “what is a Mevakesh (= well he really wants to know the truth even at his Wifey’s embarrassment). Or when he made a blessing on the plastic fruits during their Lchaim (= the informal drink to celebrate their engagement together) and the host kindly made a comment on the weekly portion about Yosef and his dreams, “what really is reality”. Or every time he ever blessed over/after eating bread apart from the fact he was a Kohen/ from the priestly family of Cohanim, being called on to lead the blessings many times and getting a lot of words wrong with his Wifey determined to correct this weekly embarrassing occurrence by teaching the Husband the correct pronunciation. And now back to the bus stop and Paros’s Purim outfit, Oih vey he’s doing this again, people in the street stop what they’re doing as Wifey and Husband unite. But not in love rather in a huff and a puff as she storms off with him and the dressing gown belt was dragging on the ground in hot pursuit. Back to their humble abode this chase takes the couple and in their confusion they forget to lock the door. “You’re not doing this anymore!” the Husband requests, “You’re not doing this anymore!” the Wifey requests. And in the end the Wifey does stop going as babies change the flow of life, but the Husband still keeps up the Purim charade. So back to the fight, they go to sleep not on great terms and the front door is unlocked. As with all good fights, the timing was impeccable and the new cleaner who’d been hanging around too much, seemed to notice the open door after midnight rounds. Made his cleaning job a quick freebee into their newlywed kitted out apartment and cleaned off with all the new (trief) phones and camera, while evilly taking the tzaddakah/ charity box. However, the big money was in the bedroom and this is where a brother-in-laws present of blue beads hanging from the door came in handy. The building Cleaner or should they say Robber was scared off by the hanging beads and dare not enter the bedroom and so live on the Wifey and Husband together. The morning awoke with sour feelings and the realization that they’d been robbed and the cleaner had done a good job of disappearing too. So now a trip to the police station doesn’t achieve anything and nor does the fact that there flying to London in a few days and their passports are gone. Oih vey, off Husband and Wifey go to the passport office in Jerusalem. So the Conciliate of Britain the great empire of old actually closed down by now and the other passport would require a trip to Tel Aviv for the other Conciliate all the way in some huge mall at the top of some huge building somewhere. Now its Wifey’s turn as they weren’t getting far in replacing the stolen passports and time was ticking on. Husband returns from the toilet with Wifey laughing hysterically “Oh I checked one of the folders in my hand bag and found all the passports”

Thank G-d, they could finally return home and then onto London, but the story of the dressing gown and beads never left their hearts and minds, Wifey and our Husband!

The inspiration behind “The Spiritual Guide to our Husband to make a happy Wifey”

To be “together”, Eliyahu Eliezer! Bs’d

Copyright to Eli Goldsmith Shlita !

This is a time to take a trip home. Right now, I’m on a bus driving through the territories of the holy land near the holy city of Jerusalem. This is really intense typing on my new gift from my family from London. The moment is deeply awakening my sense and need to express in the written form. Hopefully, please G-d only words of thanks, positivism and wholesomeness in all that G-d blesses us. The unity of the flow of time, soul and place all combining in Oneness as we reach the entrance of our destination. New live tools allow us to grow and express the inner voice that beckons us all to take a trip home. However, this time realizing this has to be done together!

photo (1)It all starts in a time where the need to complete tasks with supposed success brings us pain. The real success is the profound belief that all will be done in the right time and place with the right people with patience. The guiding force in our life is always with us, helping us discover this inner voice and truth that binds us all together with real success. A success that last forever! Which realization allows us to achieve complete happiness and convert the pain to satisfaction. The sun is setting behind the clouds and the motion sickness prevents the revelation from being expressed in short. This is a long story and one which we will have to begin and end together.

Here’s the goals of the new book bs’d!

  • 1.To bring out the soul of my mission in the form of humorous novel.

2. The story will be about a fictional person living in Israel. In clip form.

3. He is from England, he fell in love with his beautiful best friend from University and somehow found his life changing from Secular to Spiritual.

4. The main awakenings are in Israel where everything seems to flow and how his relationship with people matures.

5. The struggle with money, society and personal issues.

6. The ability to sing in the form of words written and pictured.

7. The beginning of marriage and child rearing.

8. The streets and plans and action to make a difference for the youth culture.

9. The re connection on line to the people of the past and world.

  • 10.The awakening of a real search for truth among-st a world gone mad, as Moshiach is almost here, Bkorov mamesh soon in our days complete togetherness, amen!

For advice and help to professionally edit and print this new book please email umuse613@gmail.com !

Or ask my Wifey to hold back her punches and the attempt to withhold this creative spark!

Glimpse of one part of the new book you can help make public!

This is a PRIVATE book but there are Glimpses on our new blog:-> “HUSBAND WIFEY”A BOOK IN THE WORKS WHICH YOU CAN BUILD TOGETHER <:-)

The Spiritual Guide to the Husband to make a happy Wifey, To be “together”, by Eliyahu Eliezer aka The Midnightrabbi inspired, With G-d’s help , and we need it – Copyright to Eli Goldsmith Shlita !

The Ant Infestation and smiley cake!

It was a special day of deeds of kindness, as many good husbands attempt to be in the good books and win brownie points. However, as you will tell, this husband needs to read the label more clearly and choose his weaponry more carefully.

The recent attack of ants, one in many beyond description, brought out the warrior and knight in arms in this endearing husband. Grabbing the most easy, cheapest solution that even the rules of Shabbat doesn’t forbid. The cinnamon solution.

What’s the problem with good old fashioned ant spray or even better calling and exterminator. Well this husband had no such thoughts, his goal was using the available cinnamon for cooking and royally pouring it on the problem areas. This of course was on all the those places that ants love to congregate e.g. under the fridge, on the kitchen surfaces, on the door frames, behind the book shelves in the Salon etc… And even more so this warrior of tradition woke up nice and early to do his kind deed when all were asleep so his good deed would have the hidden element of righteousness. It says in the laws of prayer, charity before prayer helps the prayers find favor above, so would his kind deed prepared his wife’s day free of one more stumbling blocks. However, this all was not meant to be, as even cinnamon as a surprised good advice to many a friend does scare away ants, even though leaving a brown tinge to any place its spread. This was not the problem in the plan, it goes much deeper and sweeter, and the special Cinnamon this champion used was really Cinnamon Sugar…

The weary wifey awoke to havoc, not just from the energetic already very alert species of young children, but an ant invasion. The ants came out in all their glory and the children screams and laughs didn’t help her start to the day with much order and calm. A call to the husband quickly clarified the situation as he proudly proclaimed his victory and then sudden defeat as she explained his chosen weapon, was a weapon of mass destruction, Sugar Cinnamon and not cinnamon. Anyhow, who asked you to interfere in the running’s of the house?

And now to the smiley cake story, a polite apology and gesture of peace.

Every husband in the whole world makes mistakes, right? This isn’t a story to excuse this husband’s deeds, but an attempt to correct what went wrong. Maybe it’s possible that the famous holy Rabbi, Rav Shlomo Zalman Aurbach Tz’l could live up to the truth of being a husband that never needed forgiveness. He himself testified at his

largely attended holy wifey and Rebbestin Tz’l funeral that he doesn’t need forgiveness as he never stepped out of line from the obligation of a Jew to G-d and to his fellow man. However, we’re talking about a husband that you and me know very well and probably needs forgiveness every single day and even that is hard in coming. So here’s just one of many of the stories of husbandry fool hardy.

The wife of this endearing young man was baking a yummy cake for the birthday of a lovely young child of theirs. She chose a sponge cake to grace her hungry family and left it settle after its time in the oven. Fortunately for the family it was a big cake that was seasoned with chocolate drops that even the most foolish husband couldn’t ruin. So the husband’s comes with appeasement in his hand, bearing a knife, begins to etch away a smiley face, assuming in his male naivety that his other female half will love the gesture. The large mouth and eyes provide this laughable man with a taste of the yummy cake. With to top it off, he leaves the knife in the mouth, forming the symbol of a cigarette, as if the cake was having a smoke. The wifey returns and enough is enough. Combined that we forgot to mention, this was a pressured time as Shabbos/ Shabbat was approaching and the children  were playing up, now her cake was having a smoke while  laughing at her, and her husband stood smugly expecting a praise and receives a potch (a yiddisha karate chop)!

To help us publish more contact us above !

To view this new important Guide you will have to sponsor its production! or…

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Really Struggle Group this one, needs a lot of editing and inspiration to come together, but this is the showcase for now

key chalahEnjoy and be careful Wifey N Training she will be saying I Love My HusbandExcited to post the new blog 2013 https://midnightrabbispiritualguide.wordpress.com/ you can build this together that means support by sending us your email = umuse613@gmail.com and your Midnightrabbi inspiresd inspirations thanks

This is our new network midnightrabbiinspired.tumblr.com!

And the key to your inspiration and happy families, it takes a lot of work and Divine help so pray!