By Eliezer Goldsmith New website http://midnightrabbi.com/ <- Please share and send any pics and testimonials friends!
So let’s grow together and get it straight don’t get our husband to shop or do anything really for Wifey to be truly happy. For sure shopping stories are a plenty but 3 times 3 = 9, and 9 isn’t a lucky number which rhymes with nein (the word is from Yiddish meaning no).
Our Husband didn’t know how to say no, but he did know how to mess up the shopping. It’s was on one of those Erev (pre-game to) Shabbos, (by now after the Shabbos Project, the honour of Shabbos and its name has somewhat been restored so you don’t need me to define this as the Sabbath). The business of this day and preparation of a day which some call Friday (Fri is the opposite of frum) and some call Sabbath mistakenly, is all about buying, cleaning running and making way for the Shabbos Hamalakah ( the Queen not of England, but Queen of time). The top product on our Husbands list is Onions for the magic Jewsih medicine, well known and beloved as Chicken soup. Our Husband is walking happily after an uplifting morning Tefillah (prayer service known as Shacharis) at a special Shul wanders into the nearby Bucharim Shuk (famous old scool market). Turning to the Onion stand he reaches out to what looks like the regular kind of Onion. Excitedly our Husbands makes his way home proud of his completed list and enters into his small Jerusalem apartment. Wifey is preparing for the team of guests expected for Shabbos, while the kids and babies making a mess. She stares at the Red Onions and groans at his proud prize. Not again, you don’t love me cries inside while outwardly she shows her angry side grabbing the Red Onions, chopping and throwing them into a pot waiting cooking on the stove. Our Husbands backs off as Wifey begins her tirade of “you never get this right”, “how many times are you going to get it wrong”, “why do I even ask you?” Anyhow, our Husbands sulks away defeated and deflated back to his pre-game Erev Shabbos. The real part of the story and the Red Onions which our Husband claims only will flavour the soup just like regular onions, is brought out to the hungry Shabbos guests. Bright red precious chicken soup isn’t looking so attractive anymore and the taste is even funkier. Wifey is not looking pleased, but this is just the beginning of our Husband reddening for Shabbos!
So our next story isn’t a repeat of the previous Red Soup wonder, rather a slight detour to the infamous Knedalach. Many of the old scool food names, ended off with the ending lach e.g. Kreplach, Bagelach, Kugelach etc… In Hebrew, Lach means “to you”. This sums up the old world view of giving and selflessness that summed up so beautifully the previous generations. Our generations prefers the more selfish terminology of e.g. Bisli, Meusli, Bambi etc… The new school food names ended off with “Li”, symbolic of “to me”. Nevertheless our Husband wants to keep the traditions of giving from his forefathers, and after selfishly; we mean selflessly inviting many guests weekly as our Wifey slaves away the real work of kindness. Our Husband once again offers to do some pre-game shopping buying Kenedalach for our once upon a time ago Red soup. Everyone knows that Kenedalach is the finishing touch of hopefully this Shabbos night’s Golden brown surprise. Hungrily our Husband returns from Shul with his excited guests. Shabbos Licht and shiny happy children add to the Shabbos spirit. As Kiddush begins after soulfully sung songs, with Wifey even more hungrily and tiredly waiting already for the meal to begin. Our Husband after Challos and fish with salad, excitedly explains to the anticipating guests the golden balls that are floating their way towards our seats will really bring out the Shabbos spirit in us all. The first guest begins and blanches, something is wrong. The second guest follows suit and he tries to hide his discomfort. Wifey begins to glare at our Husband, what is wrong this time? Our Husband bluffs his way after polishing of the soup, “delicious as always”. Wifey, the guests and our children all move onto the next course. Our Husband laughingly says “the food comes out according to the guests”, Wifey and the guests are not amused. A neighbour who also borrowed the Kendalach ingredients from them complains the next day that the Kendalach are off, Wifey has her proof and our Husband face is brighter than the Red soup.
Red Juice is not a cocktail or some sort of new-fangled energy drink. Rather an expression of our Husband stress release and let’s hopes after this inspiring story a press release. Our Husband becoming a pro in the kitchen has gone into the Bottey making business. Really bringing us to rethink his dedication to Wifey is for real or not. The truth is our Husband has learnt an important rule after all these years of heart ache. The real focus is on emotional help and care to Wifey. Not just at being proficient in making babies drinks with our Red Juice. Careful sensitive words with healthy validation are what Wifey beckons and deserves. Our Husbands really tries to be there not just as a physical support, spiritual light, but even more difficultly for him, an emotional sensitive flow. Obviously life can affect us, squeeze us from any peace of mind. Financial real needs are tested daily with literal challenges that bring our Husband to thank at least we can afford the Red Juice and filtered water to go along with it thank G-d. But what our Husband did not imagine was the stress factor was so great that the juice bottle of Red Juice was wobbling and shaking him out all over his clothes, kitchen service and in the vegetable rack. “Wifey stop checking your emails not and help me” our soft spoken Husband screams. Covered in Red Juice our Husband looks like he’s covered in blood screaming, our Wifey doesn’t know whether to laugh or cry. And as usual Wifey cleans up the mess, the kids open mouth gape onwards to the next precious treat.
Our Man-made Red pomegranate inspires joy for families and any lucky visitors to our Husband and Wifey’s entrance of town. It’s a giant model Red pomegranate, used to decorate the entrance and is often found with families posing on top of and around for the holiday pictures, it’s been used in advertisements and lifted up the spirit of the town. The theme of the town is the 7 species of the holy land. The goal is to appreciate the special blessings hidden and revealed in the holy land, and our 7 special species are once again with the speedy return of the exile symbolic of the wealth and happiness inherent in Israel. The pomegranate is the last of the 7 species and represents according to some opinions the spiritual aspect of Kingship. Our Husband always saw himself as the King of the home. However, the real key is to bring out the Queen of the relationship in Wifey. Our Husband is obligated to honour her more than himself. The main key of the relationship is the emotional level. Our Red Pomegranate if you ever noticed has a crown at its top proving its King/Queen ship. The crown along side its many rich red seeds within represents a real key of focusing on the good. Every person is filled with good even if sometimes it seems as if the person is on a lower level on the outside. Our Husband and Wifey’s online therapist Rabbi Mordechai Weinberger LCSW does deal with this challenge of low self-esteem and emotional self-worth! However, not only is our Husband’s Rabbonim, teachers, family and friends encouraging to our Husband’s unique role in Creation, but after all said and done our Wifey is our Husbands biggest supporter. Investing all her time and dedication to build herself and our Husband into to the best person possible, even if the crown seems to have a few holes in it sometimes. This is the revitalising taste of a fresh Red pomegranate, giving over perfect satchels of inspiration and a tasteful happy Husband and Wifey life together. Just watch out for the shprizting when cutting our red treat up, and this will remain a confidential story of true love.